I hate to say it, but I’m sure you already know it. Time is not on your side as a single mom. You may often feel like you are rushing through your day because you have so much to do. As a busy, working, single mom, you don’t get to have tons of quality time with your kids and of course you feel guilty about this.
Let me just say, you can let that guilt go. I know it’s easier said than done but it’s totally understandable that you have lots going on and don’t have unlimited time to spend with your kids.
I want to help ease your mind and let you know it doesn’t matter how much time you’re spending with your kids. As long as the time you do spend with them is fulfilling, that’s what matters. And there are ways you can make the most out of the little time that you do have with your kids!
Use nap time wisely!
If you have kids that are still napping, you can spend that time with your child who doesn’t nap. I definitely get needing that nap time/quiet time to get chores, cooking, or work done. I know for me it’s one of the most productive parts of my day, but I also want to have that one-on-one time with my oldest.
So I will spend 45 minutes to an hour with my daughter and then have her do quiet time for the rest of the time my son is sleeping, (which is usually another hour or so) and that still leaves me time to do work.
When ‘A’ gets that time with me, she is happy to play on her own for the rest of quiet time because I filled up her love cup with special one-on-one time.
I have been extremely guilty of this and this is something I still strive to become better at. When you are having quality time with your kids, put the electronics away!!
No phones, no tablets, no computer, no T.V. Just you and your kids. Again you may be surprised at how good you and your kids feel after just 20 minutes of fully engaging with each other.
Write out what you need to do
Many times because you have so much to do, you are only half present when you are with your kids. This is something else I am majorly guilty of. I’m always thinking about what else I need to do that day. Or I’m trying to plan out my week in my head.
Sometimes you need to write out everything that’s in your head to assess what can wait and what needs to get done immediately. I’ve found that by doing this, I’m much more likely to relax and enjoy the time I’m with my kids instead of worrying so much. You will also find by organizing your tasks, you may have more time than you think you do to spend with your kids.
Use school time
When your older child goes to school, have quality time with your younger child. Even if your oldest is only gone for a couple hours a couple times a week, (as is my case) this is a great opportunity for you to be spending time with your younger child.
This chunk of time is also really great to get errands done because you don’t have all your kids with you. You can still turn that into fun one-on-one time with your youngest and get that necessary chore done.
I do this with my son when I have to go grocery shopping. I let him help me by holding some groceries and we will look at the colors on the box or the letters. We sing songs and it’s actually quite enjoyable!
By completing your errand while your oldest is in school, that also frees up more time to spend with your kids later. Plus when you get home from doing your errand, you may still have leftover time to have quality time with your youngest.
Schedule family time
Every Saturday night you could watch a movie together. Or every Sunday you go to a park, on a hike, or to a museum. The point is not the destination, it’s that you can make a tradition out of doing one meaningful thing with them every weekend that they can look forward to.
Include your kids in chores
Yes you could ignore the housework but that tends to be more stressful for you because at some point you have to do it anyway. So instead, make everyday chores part of that special time you share together.
My kids love to ‘help’ with folding laundry so they get to fold rags, towels, and find the matches for socks. You can turn cooking into fun life lessons. My daughter likes to help me measure, pour, and stir ingredients. My son loves to ‘wash’ dishes so I let him use some soap and water and ‘wash’ a few plastic bowls and cups while I load the dishwasher.
Yes time is not on your side as a busy single mom. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have amazing, meaningful time with your children. These tips can help you create more time and fully engage with your kids. Remember, it’s the quality of the time you spend with your kids that counts, not the quantity!
One Last Thing!
This is the fifth month in a 7 month series that will feature other single mom bloggers to provide a single mom resource!! Each month we will discuss a different aspect of single mom life.
Check out this page to read other parenting tips for single moms! Single Mom Resource 101
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